Archive for Consider This!

How to love in a Valentine’s day ❤️

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Love is the foundation of everything we build in this world. If you are building something, whether it is a family, friendship, career, romantic relationship, business, or art, without love, it will fall apart.

Love is an act of kindness. It is an acceptance without judgement and a support with no strings attach. It is to accept flaws of others and yet support and encourage them to grow. Everyone has their own definition of love. One of the major misconceptions of love is to think that it means to control others and/or is to sacrifice self for others. The reason why relationships built on those definition do not work out in a long run is because it is unsustainable.

There are many ways to show how you love someone and the act of service is one of them. However, in some cultures, women are supposed to take care of others before taking care of themselves. In my opinion, the most important way to have love in your life is to love yourself. Just like how you cannot help a family or friend in need if you do not have the resources or means, you cannot love others until you love yourself first. Cultivating a relationship with yourself is crucial for your well-being.

  • Why should you love yourself?
    Hate is a negative feeling that will impact your health. Life is better when you love yourself because it helps you grow to be a better person and gain self-confidence. Loving yourself allows you to be a self advocate which is important because only you know your needs better than anyone else. Additionally, only you can complete yourself (not your better half).
  • How do you love yourself?
    Loving yourself doesn’t just mean buying a whole bunch of chocolate for yourself or spending money on self. Self love means accepting yourself, allowing yourself to change and grow by removing yourself from the situation that doesn’t allow you to grow to become a better person. It means to cultivate a good relationship with yourself.
  1. Reflect: Take a time to reflect on your life. Reflection allows you to realize the  mistakes you might have made, regrets you might have had, grudges you might have held for too long which ruined your mental health, maybe you stayed in a wrong job or a relationship for far too long. Maybe you let others take advantage of you, maybe you neglected your health, maybe you hung out with the wrong crowd, maybe you put too much energy into mending the relationships that would never work out.
  2. Forgive: Once you are done reflecting, it is important to treat yourself with the kindness and forgive yourself. Whether it is a mistake made by you or if you were wronged, it is important to let go and move on.
  3. Choose to Change: If you do not like how things are, change it. Remember that you have a choice to change. You can choose to make your life better, choose to eat healthy, choose to change the way you think, and choose to remove negativity from your life. Knowing that you have a choice is a liberating feeling.
  4. Self Compassion and Love: Take care of your body and take care of those who are important to you. It is important to let others love you just as much as loving yourself and others. Let others care for you without being dependent or burden on them.
  5. Repeat: We learn and we forget. Sometimes we cruise through life without realizing where we are headed. So, repeat this process of loving yourself every so often :)

Hope you celebrate this valentine’s day by learning to love yourself ❤️

Happy Valentine’s day! 

Less is More: Yatra into Minimalism!

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“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”

― Mahatma Gandhi

Over the years I have accumulated a lot of possessions. However, I realized that having more things didn’t make my life easier, in fact, it made it more difficult. Majority of those possession were things that I could easily live without. Having too much possessions takes too much time to organize, it takes away your freedom. If things you have are not adding any value to your life, whether it is clothing, books, apps on cell phones or relationships, it only causes you stress and hinders your growth.

I have been trying to integrate this “less is more” philosophy into my life for a year now. Before allowing minimalism lifestyle to be a part of my life, I asked myself three questions.

  1. What is my definition of minimalism?
  2. How am I doing this?
  3. Why am I doing this?

1. What is my definition of minimalism?
Minimalism is a growing trend lately. There are plenty of minimalism lifestyle blogs and YouTube channels online. There are people who are extreme minimalist (with no more than certain number of possessions) to somewhat minimalist. In my opinion, it is best to have your own definition of minimalism. Unless and until you have your own definition of minimalism, it is rather difficult to follow this lifestyle. To me, minimalism is to live intentionally and mindfully.

2. How am I doing this?
As I am headed to minimalism journey, I follow these 3 rules.
a. Donate things that I no longer use. “One man’s junk is another man’s treasure”. You never know who you could be helping by donating things you have not been using for years.
b. Consume mindfully. Whether it is buying things online, in a store or just consuming water and electricity, always do it mindfully. If you do not need it, do not waste it.
c. Charity to change. Sometimes I have a sudden urge to buy things. So, these days instead of buying that thing, I donate $3 to Wikipedia and wait to see if my shopping urge dissipates. Three dollars isn’t a lot of money, but considering my impulsive shopping urges, it does add up 😛 . So, it is a win win situation for me because I get to support Wikipedia while breaking my impulsive shopping habit.

3. Why am I doing this?
I decided to incorporate minimalism into my lifestyle because it is a value driven and an intentional way of living. The minimalism lifestyle incorporates socialism, sustainability, environmental protection, energy conversations, compassion and most importantly mindfulness into one practice. Donating things I no longer use, allows me to share things that I have more of; replacing rather than buying more, allows me to be a creative problem solver; mindful consumption of all things including buying or use of electricity and water, allows me to save money but also conserve resources, consuming less and mindfully purchasing things that are environment friendly, allows me to protect the earth or at least play a small role in protecting the earth. Minimalism has many benefits but most importantly minimalism simplifies your life allowing you to have more stress free time. The time you can now spend to do things that are more important to you. There is nothing more important than time in this world.

A few of my favourite minimalism related reads are:

Minimalism: Live a Meaningful Life by Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus
My Exile Lifestyle  by Colin Wright
Good Bye, things  by Fumiko Sasaki

I find this philosophy worth sharing. I hope this post will excite you to at least come up with your own definition of minimalism.